LEARN THE RULES, BREAK THE RULES.
Lots of years ago, when I was a young dom in graduate school, I hung out in a local coffee house and someone described me by saying, “Chuck is a non-conformist. First he finds out what constitutes conformity and then does the opposite.” I had a real good laugh at that one because is was true then and it still is. I think that I was just lucky to be born with an ornery streak and it has served me well in my life, allowing me to charge in where not only angels fear to tread, but devils as well. I’m just a career rule-breaker.
Now, it’s not as easy to do that as it used to be. For one thing, there are a lot fewer rules to break. I mean our TRUE forebears in BDSM, the Adversary Culture, (who never would have been caught dead on a motorcycle!) had it pretty simple. All they had to do was live together without getting married, drink some absinthe on occasion and just in general be superior to the Great Unwashed and flaunt that superiority. That was all it took. In a relatively homogeneous society finding conformity to be the opposite of was no great difficulty. All you needed was money so you could get away with it.
Now—EGAD!! First, you have to decide whom you are going to tweak. Are you going to bug the despised xtians? Are you going to give feminazis the shits? Are there any members of the Obsolete Guard around the play space just asking to have itching powder dropped into their silly hats? It takes work to find just the right buttons to push.
On the other hand, with so many hypersensitive baboons bouncing around out of their trees, it is probably easier because all you have to do is be yourself and you’re bound to step on some toes. But then, don’t just step on those toes—jump on them!
And the beauty of it all is that if you have the wit and charm to do it properly, they will get all upset but no one else will care that they are. And the more upset they get, the more annoyed everyone else will get—at them!
You see, rule maker types have a real bad weakness. They take themselves way too seriously and thus they sort of grind on everyone’s nerves. And the ones who think the rules should be followed are just as bad. The only reason that they get away with it is that people generally don’t like confrontation and so no one tells them that their rules are bullshit, at least not until you come along. And when you make a point of ignoring their rules and do it with a certain happiness, people will naturally gravitate to you because you are a breath of fresh air, a liberating force. The rule makers will stripped of their power and once again anarchy will triumph as they finally become frustrated enough to attempt a showdown, only to be shown the door themselves.
Remember, laughter is not only the best medicine, it is the most powerful weapon.
Lots of years ago, when I was a young dom in graduate school, I hung out in a local coffee house and someone described me by saying, “Chuck is a non-conformist. First he finds out what constitutes conformity and then does the opposite.” I had a real good laugh at that one because is was true then and it still is. I think that I was just lucky to be born with an ornery streak and it has served me well in my life, allowing me to charge in where not only angels fear to tread, but devils as well. I’m just a career rule-breaker.
Now, it’s not as easy to do that as it used to be. For one thing, there are a lot fewer rules to break. I mean our TRUE forebears in BDSM, the Adversary Culture, (who never would have been caught dead on a motorcycle!) had it pretty simple. All they had to do was live together without getting married, drink some absinthe on occasion and just in general be superior to the Great Unwashed and flaunt that superiority. That was all it took. In a relatively homogeneous society finding conformity to be the opposite of was no great difficulty. All you needed was money so you could get away with it.
Now—EGAD!! First, you have to decide whom you are going to tweak. Are you going to bug the despised xtians? Are you going to give feminazis the shits? Are there any members of the Obsolete Guard around the play space just asking to have itching powder dropped into their silly hats? It takes work to find just the right buttons to push.
On the other hand, with so many hypersensitive baboons bouncing around out of their trees, it is probably easier because all you have to do is be yourself and you’re bound to step on some toes. But then, don’t just step on those toes—jump on them!
And the beauty of it all is that if you have the wit and charm to do it properly, they will get all upset but no one else will care that they are. And the more upset they get, the more annoyed everyone else will get—at them!
You see, rule maker types have a real bad weakness. They take themselves way too seriously and thus they sort of grind on everyone’s nerves. And the ones who think the rules should be followed are just as bad. The only reason that they get away with it is that people generally don’t like confrontation and so no one tells them that their rules are bullshit, at least not until you come along. And when you make a point of ignoring their rules and do it with a certain happiness, people will naturally gravitate to you because you are a breath of fresh air, a liberating force. The rule makers will stripped of their power and once again anarchy will triumph as they finally become frustrated enough to attempt a showdown, only to be shown the door themselves.
Remember, laughter is not only the best medicine, it is the most powerful weapon.